Dane's poster fury

He has an hilarious point

We really like Dane Cook. Who?

Yeah same with us, although you’ll be familiar with the lad from a host of OK-ish films Employee of the Month and Good Luck Chuck.

And he stars in what looks like a better than average rom-com My Best Friend’s Girl with Kate Hudson and Jason Biggs. Good on him.

Except he's furious because of the film poster – and he has a point. So over to Dane and his MySpace blog for the full skinny.

‘Before the downpour, let me just say that my new movie, My Best Friends Girl, is the best / funniest film I've done yet. It's got a terrific cast. Kate Hudson, Alec Baldwin, Jason Biggs, and myself really kicked the funny around.

'This movie showcases our talents accordingly as it expands on them. It's a fun R-rated flick. An edgy comedy with a dash of romance.

'That being said, let me address the fact that although I'm not a marketing major, I have a bit of a trusted reputation after 18 years self promoting. I'd like to inform you I had no say in this marketing campaign, but if I did, things would be different since it is obvious that this poster is boring / odd and has zero to do with the movie I performed in.

'Here are a few things that truly blow about my upcoming movie poster to promote the release of the film opening on 19 September:

1. Graphics: Whoever Photoshopped our poster must have done so at taser point with 3 minutes to fulfill their hostage takers deranged obligations. They should have called Donnie Hoyle and had him give a tutorial using "You Suck at Photoshop" templates. This is so glossy it makes Entertainment Weekly look wooden.

2. My head: The left side of my face seems to be melting off of my skull. I guess I am looking directly into the Ark of the Covenant? Are they going for the bells palsy thing here? My left side looks like Britney Spears' vagina.

3. The Stare: My character apparently has fallen in love with a strand of Kate Hudsons hair. Kate's mannequin is desperately in love with the inside of my right ear while Jason is half stunned, half corsage.

4. Lips: It looks like I'm wearing Maybelline Water Shine Diamonds Liquid Lipstick. My characters name is now Winter Solstice and I'm a hooker with a heart of gold. Jason is my floral carrying pimp, while Kate is my first trick!

5. Fashion: My character is sporting a very high collar I mean damn they should be snow capped at that altitude. It's going for the vampire lurking in the castle basement vibe. An Olympic pole vaulter would have a tough go clearing that collar. I'm also able to turn my head comfortably 180 degrees, because I was raised in an abandoned barn by a family of owls.

6. Flesh: It's no secret that I'm more rugged facially due to a drunken visit by the teen acne fairy, but according to this poster I've got perfect porcelain flesh. I look like the fuckin' bathroom floor at Caesars Palace. One of Marie Osmond's dolls would look at me and say 'Sh*t... that guys got flawless skin!'

7. Hair: It's actually a close up shot of Tom Sellecks Magnum P.I. mustache they photo-slapped on my noggin'.

8. The set: Pick one. This entire film takes place: A. on Gattaca B. at the Fortress of Solitude C. inside a crystal wind chime

9. The cast: Alec Baldwin is so f**king funny in this movie! Is he on the poster? I think so. He plays the wise-talking plant Jason is clutching.

10. Final thoughts: I set out to make a movie like the contemporary men and women, that you and I respect, are making. My generation of comedians, actors, directors and producers that I wish to collaborate with as I build a solid body of work.

'Granted, one poster stinking up the joint isn't the end of the world. Yet it sends the wrong message about our movie and I just wanted you to know, that I feel the pain. I really love the film and I know from past missteps marketing wise that the wrong poster sends the wrong audience into the theater.

'PS – 'Its funny what love can make you do.' I just threw up all over this awful poster.

Wow, wait ... it looks better. Hey ... I love my new movie. Jeez ... it IS funny what love can make you do.’

Brilliant

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