Madonna Muffs It

You wouldn't want to arm wrestle her

Madonna wanted everything, Usher just needed a map. Welcome to the Radio One Big Weekend.

The Queen of Pop took the nickname to heart when it came to her backstage requirements. According to the People, Madonna's, er, people told the show organisers how to treat their star in no uncertain fashion.

'Think of your own Queen and add a bit more,' was the headliner's reported instructions, as she needed two trailers for herself and her 70-strong entourage.

'She took a lot of accommodating,' said a source, somewhat euphemistically.

We don't know what Saturday headliner Usher asked for but, judging by his banter with the Maidstone crowd, a decent atlas might have been an idea.

'What's up Manchester?' he cried, to the general bemusement of all.

On the subject of bemusement, it sounds like Madonna left the crowds scratching their heads as well.

Her arrival on stage saw her decked out in black silk coat, black trousers, black boots and black gloves and carrying a silver cane. The Times reckoned it was an outfit designed to make her look tough. 'But with her trousers billowing above her boots like jodhpurs, she was less the raunchy temptress than the well-heeled woman in search of a horse.'

The paper admired her toned biceps and dancing, but reckoned the singing strayed off key during the short, six song set.

Doesn't bode well for the forthcoming tour, frankly.

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