Man U fire blanks

United they stand and squeak a win

Manchester United won the Community Shield yet again yesterday but it wasn't easy.

Indeed, having been expected to sweep aside FA Cup winners Portsmouth, without Ronaldo – out injured until mid-October – and Rooney – virus – the words 'cow's' 'arse' and 'banjo' spring to mind. We'd have said 'score' and 'brothel' but we didn't want Wayne to go back to his old ways.

United's 30th trophy under Sir Alex's guidance came after a dull 0-0 draw and a penalty shoot out and the Reds' lack of firepower is starting to bode well for Chelsea's Premiership chances.

No wonder Ferguson is so keen on signing Berbatov. Or not, depending on which reports you believe. According to the papers, Ferguson may be having second thoughts about signing the sulky Spurs striker.

'There is nothing at all to say about Berbatov,' said the Scot. 'We’re looking at options elsewhere. 'We’d like to add to our squad and we’re making moves in that direction. We’re trying.'

According to rumours, 'trying' could include giving up on Berbatov and tabling a £20m bid for Barcelona's Thierry Henry. That should cheer Arsene Wenger up then.

Meanwhile, Spurs seem to be handling the sale of Robbie Keane well AND look to be working towards a Berbatov-free season. And how.

They spanked Roma 5-0 in a pre-season friendly, with new boy David Bentley and back in-form Darren Bent both bagging two each.

Tottenham scoring freely and United struggling.

Did we slip into a parallel universe in July?

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